pulling the plug.
So I’m no longer his friend on Facebook. Ha, I felt like I was pulling the plug on a dying relative. What a mental image, putting to death my dreams. Or like on Titanic, it’s like I let go of Jack and watched him sink to the bottom.
It’s all not a very pretty picture.
But it was about time, wasn’t it?
Now that I’m crushless and visonless… I have time to really see things. For one, I see opportunities. I have no money and I got a websiting potential. That’s a good opportunity (and I jumped at it).
I’m noticing the kinds of people the churchians are. Should I be worried? Is there really a focus on the spiritual? I have one year to influence ’em. I am Ezekiel, wouldn’t he do more? Wouldn’t he make more of an effort to keep these guys accountable?
I don’t really know yet. I don’t know where God is taking me. But I trust Him.
God’s always found time to teach me about trust. I remember one time He really questioned me on my reliance in Him. He asked me what it meant to trust, and all I came up with was that if I jumped off a cliff, He’d rescue me.
But can I trust Him with stuff like this? My dreams? My ambitions?
God, I want to. I really truly do.
And that’s what I’m going to figure out.
Bring it on, Life.
I’m ready.
In Him. With Love,
Lauren Deidra
September 3, 2007